Chatting with the girls. The Southern Ladies, that is.

Just before Christmas I had the extreme privilege of  speaking to a group of woman at a monthly luncheon. This is something I enjoy doing, not only because I like people in general, but I really consider myself an ambassador to the sport of kayaking, and truly will talk about it to anyone who will listen. That's actually in my bio!

At any rate, I had met Elaine, this month's hostess, at Mule Camp when I was out pounding the pavement for the club. When she called me toward the beginning of the month and asked me to speak to her group, of course I said yes. She told me it would be a group of about 30. I mentioned senior citizens, and she said that there would only by 2 or 3 of those.

Anyone who spends any time speaking with groups knows how important it is that you know your audience. With the information that Miss Elaine had given me, I was able to craft the perfect power point for the group. My son and I got everything together, and headed over to the restaurant to set up. Sidebar: Of course the projector took a poo.

Life lesson time.

As we walked into the room, it quickly became evident that with the exception of 2 or 3 women, the entire group was well into their 60's and 70's! Slowly I realized that Southern Rules applied in this situation. Miss Elaine meant that there was 2 women who were senior...to HER! Oh crap, I thought. What do I have in this presentation to entertain this particular group?

I decided to mention fat a lot. That worked!  I told them my story about how I lost the 62 pounds for health reasons, how my doctor told me the burst blood vessel could have been in my brain, and how losing weight and paddling allowed me to come off of the expensive Benicar.  I told them that the last 10 to 12 pounds came back to visit once in a while ("I brought them along today!") and spoke about how scared I was that the first time I flipped my boat that because I was large I might get stuck upside down in a manner much like that of the Poseidon and be left for dead.

And then I told them that kayaking is life changing, and you need to embrace what you are and go from there.
Lots of laughs, lots of nods of agreement and understanding.

And lots of interest in my Kayaks and Coffee Class next summer. Yes!!

All in all, a really good day.

See you out there!
TKM

Sometimes even the most seasoned parents mess up!

TheKayakMom isn't just some moniker I pulled out of the air. Of course I paddle, and I'm a mom. But I've said before that I started paddling back when my son was involved in the program.  I've been learning lately that I  kind of bungled his exit from the sport. I can't change that, but maybe I can help you not make the same mistake.

My son started paddling in middle school, and because of overlapping practice times, he quit football because he couldn't do both. I remember it was a really painful decision for him, but he went on to paddle and had some really good times, got into great shape, made some great friends, and went to some interesting places. I know he really loved football, but he wasn't a starter, so I was happy to see him go into kayaking both from a safety standpoint and because he enjoyed it.

Things went well for a number of years, until THE injury. I don't know how much I've mentioned this, but his ankle was broken in two places just prior to Jr World trials, and he was never really the same. I think this is where my epic fail begins. I wanted him to stay in the sport, because it had done such great things for him. I saw that it was painful for him, because he wasn't able to compete with the guys he could before. He would drive to practice and sleep in the car, and I would yell at him.

I was so wrong. Years later we talk about this, and I know that I should let him just drop out when he wanted to. He never really wanted to disappoint me, and I did him a disservice by making him go. I'm so sorry son. I was selfish, I guess. I didn't want to leave the club, so I wouldn't let you.

Thank goodness you had a coach with enough wisdom to get you to come to me and tell me that. I need to thank that coach for doing that. I found the strength to create my own space with the club, my own identity.

So, what lesson is there here?

Well, listen to your kids. If there is pain, it is your job as a parent to help your child navigate through it, not add to it. I regret not listening sooner, but I will never make the mistake again.

Love you son. And, I'm sorry.

TKM